Monday 18 January 2016

Getting to 'NO' you (Adventures of L-Plate Gran)


There is a reason why it is called 'The Terrible Twos' - and it has absolutely nothing to do with clever alliteration. Child specialists and experts may drone on about 'infant separation' or the 'need for establishing the self'. The rest of us put it down to just plain cussedness!

Little G is already a fully paid up member of the club. Take, for example, the small toy dog. Every time we go out, the small toy dog comes with us. It has to walk along walls, and jump on and off steps along the way. It has to do this to the accompaniment of 'woof-woof.......woof-woof'.

Sometimes, the dog has to go back and repeat the process. I don't know why and I can't get a logical explanation out of either of them. There is also the stairgate thing. The stairgate has to be closed behind us when Little G and I go upstairs. If it is left open, we must return to the bottom of the stairs and begin our journey again.

It's like Snakes and Ladders meets Pilgrim's Progress but without any allegory. Or dice. Then there is the dancing. Dancing takes place in the kitchen. Only in the kitchen. And nowhere else. Ever. I'm hoping she'll grow out of this by the time she's sixteen or her social life could be rather limited.

Meanwhile we muddle along together in a baffling world of ever-changing but terribly important rules which one of us, (me) continually fails to get right, and the other one, (her) persistently fails to provide a logical explanation for. Bit like life, really ...


To be continued...    ....

11 comments:

  1. I have trouble opening and closing these modern stair gates so it is a real nuisance being told by a 2 year old that you must close it. I once had to climb over it once she'd gone to sleep!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I remember that phase so well. I don't particularly relish the prospect, if I'm ever a grandmother, of having to go through it again, albeit part-time.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm hoping that, one stage removed, we'll both survive!

      Delete
  3. Oh yes...the terrible twos. I remember them well, even now. I don"t who was in tears more often during those long and painful years - me or the children! I rather think it was me. Lots of counting to ten involved! Good luck, CarolStar!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That was supposed to be 'I don't know who was in tears....' I know I type the words.....pfff

      Delete
  4. Your function seems to be to thwart her at every turn. She's just practising being independent. Nothing like you, then?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I DO see my daughter in her...Of course I was compliance personified.

      Delete
  5. I love this series Carol, each post brings back memories of these times with my own children. I definitely wouldn't want to revisit those times with my daughter though, she was a terror, perfectly delightful now of course - haha!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Haha! SO familiar! Something was done one way once & now it MUST at all times be done that way! Still, we are at least allowed to dance outside of the kitchen, so we we are not suffering under quite the authoritarian regime you are!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I may have to apply for a transfer..mind, given The Toddler's inclination to perform radical surgery while cutting hair, maybe I'm better off staying put.

      Delete

So here's your chance! Talk to me. Comments will be visible after moderation.