Monday 13 April 2015

A Very Steep Learning Circle (Adventures of L-Plate Gran)


Since You must be mad entrusted Little G into my rickety old hands, I have learned many things. The first thing I have learned is that I know nothing. Working from this low base I have progressed to mastering a few basics. The primary one being that tops on things that are labelled 'Childsafe' are also 'OAPsafe'. The time wasted trying to open stuff is probably comparable to the time needed to read Love & Fate. (Incidentally I'm claiming that I have read it on this basis).

The same applies to clear plastic drinking cup covers. I am always handing Little G her cup with the top still on because I can't SEE it. She then tries to drink ... and hands it back. The expression of patient resignation her face is becoming hard to cope with.

There have been some minor successes, however. I can now get the purple buggy to sit, lie and stand on command, which is an advance on previous attempts. And then there are the bus timetables. Little G and I ride buses a lot. They are free and there are choices. Thus I now carry round in my head the morning, midday and early evening times of the 321 Luton to Watford bus, and the 657 St Albans bus (It used to be the 625. No, I don't know why they changed it so please do not ask me).

Given my failure to get any grade at all in O level Maths, this mastery has been rather satisfying, and has marked the zenith of my current achievements, which shows how low the bar is set. Sadly even this has now been taken away from me as last week all the local bus companies changed to their Summer timetables, so I have gone round full circle. Once again, I know nothing.

To be continued  ....   .....

14 comments:

  1. I don't think you give yourself enough credit, Carol. The act of getting on and off a bus, which includes manoeuvring that buggy (I always feel admiration for those mothers with a few flicks here and there fold up & unfold their buggies as the rest of the bus watches them manage the baby and the shopping) is a testament to your depth perception & determination. Mastering new skills is what keeps us young. Well done you!

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    1. Thank you. I have learned to get off backwards. And I can throw a wobbly if the driver parks too far from the kerb. That's about it...

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  2. I still think you'd benefit from investing in roller blades...

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    1. Given that she's just started walking, I fear you may be right

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  3. You'll have yet more fun when the words start coming - my grandson was so frustrated that I couldn't understand his need for a purple ... (apple!!)

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    1. haha..I can't wait...and I guess the 'baby words' will enter our vocabulary!

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  4. loads more fun to come yet, don't know about you, Carol, but can't wait to read all about them!

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  5. I'm lost in almost silent admiration! Bus and train timetables escape me so I use the car! Mind you, even in the coldest weather Toots likes the top down so we drive around in clothes suitable for Eskimos and the heater full blast in a roofless car. As for the buggy!! Don't get me started. It ended up in the back of the car more often than the boot because I simply couldn't work out how to fold it. The Daughter, with a contemptuous flick, would sort it out, fix me with a look which said all to clearly, "and you have how many degrees mother?" So I take my hat off to you Carol. More power to your wrist action.

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    1. Aww..thanks Prof E..sometimes it seems like I am not coping...ah well...at least Little G hasn't a clue.

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  6. Impressed by your prowess, Carole - & the fact you've not been thrown off the bus yet! Next stop Westminster?

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  7. This post had me laughing out loud. Poor you! Summer timetable! So funny but frustrating too. You're doing a grand job!

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  8. I hope so. I expect I shall get blamed for most of the tragedies in her life, when she grows up...

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  9. Oh CarolStar, I am so enjoying these Learner Gran posts! Despite the trials, I suspect you love every minute of it!

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  10. I love this 'The expression of patient resignation her face is becoming hard to cope with' - hahaha!! I get that from my 22 year old with everything I can't manage still, so not much changes :-)

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